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Rap Sensation M.P. Broadbent's Latest Oration is Sweeping the Nation

SatiricPress.com
Above: Rapper M.P. Broadbent with a member of his B-Boy Posse, the N.D.W.A.

OTTAWA (SP) — Buoyed by the popularity of a one-minute rap video that Ottawa-Centre NDP candidate Ed Broadbent put on his website, the former party leader has decided to release a full-length version of the rap anthem "Let Your Back Bench Slide". Satiric Press has obtained an exclusive copy of the lyrics to this catchy new song, written and performed by M.P. Broadbent and the N.D.W.A. (New Democrats With Attitude):

Hi there, I'm Ed,/ and as you can see,
I'm running again for /the NDP.

Some don't know/ why I've come back.
To them I say,/ you don't know Jack!

Layton that is,/ a man of conviction.
He'll do well in this race./ That's my bold prediction.

Some of his peeps are/ the Barenaked Ladies.
He got more game than/ Tracy McGrady.

The Ladies, they wrote/ "Be My Yoko Ono".
So what if Paul Martin/ is hanging with Bono?

How can he be shocked by/ a scandal so sinister
as AdScam when he was/ the Finance Minister?

Harper won't say what/ he really thinks.
But look and you'll see that/ he nods and he winks.

He'd outlaw gay marriage/ and abortion too.
And healthcare would be changed/ from one tier to two.

Military spending and tax cuts galore.
Tough luck if you're gay or you're sick or you're poor.

He loudly supported/ the war in Iraq.
Though he's trying his darndest/ to take that one back.

And then there's the Bloc and/ a guy named Duceppe.
But who cares about them/ outside of Quebec?

So vote with your conscience,/ and vote with your heart.
Get rid of the Liberals./ Let's have a fresh start.

We float like a butterfly,/ sting like a bee/
Knockout the others,/ and vote NDP!

Above: Ed's back, and he's ready to deliver a knockout punch to anyone who stands in his way.
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